Monday, November 8, 2010

Evil Unleashed: The Mummy (2003)

In fake ancient Egypt which looks like somewhere behind a hotel in Nevada, Nefretesia commits suicide in a bid for eternal life. Cut to the present day where an archaeology dig has unearthed her sarcophagus buried only a few feet below the surface.

When the professor touches it, he screams in pain. His assistants are then attacked by plastic scorpions to the face. The scorpions sit there unmoving until they appear to be pulled off by strings.

At the local community college, complete with community theater level acting, the small archaeology class decides to head to their professors office to check out the mummy. They ask if they can clean the artifacts, but are told no since there is a specific process and the items need to be handled carefully. Inexplicably the professor then hands them a sacrificial dagger to pass amongst themselves.

When the professor suggests chanting the Egyptian Ritual for Everlasting Life, everyone except one girl is all for it. She leaves as she senses there will be danger. The group chants and the mummy comes back to life. When the kids leave, an ancient artifact sticks to the bubblegum on the bottom of one guys sneaker. Really?

The mummy turns out to be Nefretesia. Sometimes she is dressed as a raggedy old skeleton faced mummy, but other times men see her as a sexy dancing lady holding a fake gold dagger which she plunges into their hearts.

When the girls figure out what is going on, they head for the Indian Burial Ground (yeah, that's right, you heard me correctly). It's supposed to be an hour away. They drive all night and then say it will take an hour to get there. There is another incident with an ancient artifact sticking to bubblegum on someone's shoe. Come on!! Once is bad enough, but twice?!

This is super low budget and it shows. Please take a look at these screen captures to gauge the true badness.

Here we see a dagger and necklace made out of the purest....gold.

Good god! It's a plastic scorpion attack!

Yup, that's one non-threatening little Mummy.

The mummy has monster hands.

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